November is National Adoption Awareness Month. I have talked a lot about adoption in general here and at Mamiverse and so I thought I’d share a few posts this month about multicultural issues in parenting.
Today, I am answering one of the questions I am asked most frequently.
How do you do Happy’s hair?
Contrary to popular belief, I do not finger curl every single curl on Happy’s head. I don’t curl any hair on Happy’s head. Those exquisite spiral curls are just what Happy’s hair does. That said, curly hair is really delicate (this seems to be on interest to people because everyone wants to touch Happy’s hair) and so we do try to take very good, gentle care of it.
I am answering this question at a funny time because we just recently tweaked Happy’s hair care regiment, and it usually takes a bit for us to decide if it’s just right or not. So, here’s what we are doing right now and I’ll also share what we did for years before Happy’s hair got a little thicker and needed more penetrating products.
Shampoo: We use Shea Moisture Moisture Retention Shampoo. Curly hair thirsts for moisture and so you want to make sure that every thing you put in curly hair is really, really moisturizing. Shea Moisture does the trick for us. That said, we only shampoo Happy’s hair once a week so that over the course of the week, his natural oils have time to travel down the hair shaft (this is commonly recommended for all curly girls and boys). The other nights it gets a really good conditioning treatment that gently cleans the scalp.
Conditioner: We love this new to us Mixed Chicks deep conditioner. We pile it on, let Happy play for a bit for a good conditioning, and then rinse after its had a time to sit.
Of note: until recently, we used the Shea Moisture Conditioner but were finding that we needed even more moisture in Happy’s conditioner of late and so went with this deep conditioner.
Out of the shower, I try to gently dry his hair with a pillow case (much gentler on the curls). Truth be told, BF totally dries his hair with a towel (wince).
Detangle: In the morning, we spray his hair with the Suave detangler and that resets the curls.
Styling Product: We had been using a creme for years that we just loved but Happy’s hair is getting a little too thick for the creme (we used Kinky Curly leave-in conditioner for about 2 years) to be able to permeate down his whole curl so we recently changed to a foam so that it will cover more of the hair. I’d love to have an organic foam for him as the Mixed Chicks and Shea Butter products are organic so I am still on the look out (truth be told, this Paul Mitchell foam was for me and we were in between hair products for Happy and we used this in the interim and saw that it did a better job with coverage than his creme at that point).
1. We never, ever comb Happy’s hair. I don’t think very gently combing it with a wide tooth combed while he’s got some conditioner in would be a problem but Happy is super sensitive and would never ever stand for it so we just don’t.
2. I cut Happy’s hair curl by curl a few times a week. I check his hair a few times a week as needed and trim any curls that are getting a little unfurled at the ends or have become matted.
Do you or one of your kids have curly hair? What products/processes do you use?
What questions do you have about multicultural parenting? I am happy to try to get to them this month!