So one of my close friends asked me why BF is always BF on the blog so I thought I would tell you that story. And if you are wondering why BF is BF period, you have to read this blog post.
Years ago, when BF and I were just dating (which is when I called him the man that I see), we both had houses in our lil’ town. Early on Saturday and Sunday mornings, we would go on five mile walks, working our way through his neighborhood and mine and all sorts of points in between. Whenever we hit downtown, we would run into a bit of a logjam as the Main Street of our little town is its heart and soul. I would see people I knew from the college where I worked, he would see people he knew from living in the town forever, and we would slowly make our way down the road, averaging a new conversation about every ten paces. Whenever we said goodbye to any males we were talking to, said male would clamp BF’s shoulder and say, “this guy is going to be mayor one day.” BF would shrug it off all “aw shucks” style and then we’d keep walking.
Mostly, I chalked up that mayor schtick to the way men talk and to BF having some history in the town. I didn’t believe BF had any real political aspirations, but as we grew more and more serious, and the “this guy is going to be mayor one day” banter continued, I wondered. Did BF really want to be mayor one day?
So I asked.
“Are you planning on running for mayor?”
“What?” BF responded, absolutely confused.
“Well that’s what people say around here- that you are going to be mayor one day. Are you planning on running?”
This was about the same time that Election 2000 was rolling along, and I was a news junkie. In the weeks following the election when we didn’t have a President, I stayed up all night repeatedly trying to figure out what in the world was going to happen (old history teachers die hard, I reckon). Meanwhile, BF had forgotten there had been an election and that we didn’t have a president.
“No, I’m not running for mayor. That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”
“I’m not the one saying it. Everyone around town says it. And that’s totally cool if you want to run for mayor. I just can’t date you if you plan to, that’s all.”
BF, who had previously not been paying much attention to what he thought was just a crazy conversation, grew more interested now.
“You couldn’t date me if I was running for mayor?”
“Oh, heck no. There is no way I could be the wife of a small town mayor. Could you imagine the late night phone calls about power outages and people knocking on the door wanting to talk about their neighbor’s fence (this would end up being a premonition as fences became a big part of town talk a few years ago)? I can’t have any part of that. Totally cool if you want to be mayor. I might even vote for you, depending on your policies, but I can’t date you or marry you if that’s a dream you have so I thought we should just go ahead and have this conversation just in case.”
We now call BF’s commitment to not run for mayor our prenuptial agreement.
And since BF can’t run for mayor, I feel like it is only fair that I don’t base my entire writing career on spraying him up all the time. Oh there are sometimes I just can’t resist like when we fight over cupcakes or divide our bed with masking tape or he gives me five dollars for Valentine’s Day, but I draw the line at telling you about the time that he got caught on the roof pressure washing while singing at full tilt the Indiana Jones theme by Carly the Cupcake Maker and Snake Wrangler and our other daily moments that really are so delightful and fun but stay between us and our little family. Seriously, a man needs a smidge of privacy and some modicum of respect.
ROFL……No. You. Did. Not!!!
BAAAAHAAAHAAAA! Tears…tears streaming!!!